Palin To Run For Supreme Overlord Of Earth

Wasilla, Alaska - After stunning the nation on Friday with her sudden
resignation as the Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin further shocked both
supporters and opponents alike by declaring herself a candidate for
Supreme Overlord of Earth. The position, which does not currently exist, is expected to be created by Lord Xenu when he returns to resume his reign over the Earth.

"On this July 4th, when the world celebrates America's Independence from Soviet tyranny," proclaimed Palin "I thought it was only appropriate to launch my campaign as the chief officeholder to protect
the rights and freedoms of all people on Earth. I know there are many who don't believe in Lord Xenu, and I promise to treat them as equally as the most passionate believers. The forces of darkness in this world have obscured our knowledge of Xenu and the road to true enlightenment, but once he returns we'll have our most profound questions revealed to be only small tokens in his amazing wisdom!"

A reporter asked Palin if she believed that she was qualified for the
tremendous responsibility of running the world. "Oh my yes." Palin
said, "As governor of Alaska I was the highest level executive on the
northernmost city of the free world. I am literally on top of the world
here, and I can see everywhere from the suburbs of Siberia to that land
down under, Austria."

When another reporter asked if this were a hoax, Sarah produced a small
hand held device which vaporized the reporter in a puff of smoke. She then cocked her head a little and smiled, asking if there were any more questions. There were none as the remaining reporters all donned "Sarah for Overlord" t-shirts as they fled to their cars.